I was coming from Endiro Coffee when I noticed a humanoid looking down at me from a shop on the first floor of Acacia mall. Clad in a cream shawl lapel tuxedo, I could swear I saw it wink at me; daring me to find out how much it would cost me to pull off such a sleek polished look. Challenge accepted!
I knew I could never afford a suit like that, not in this lifetime at least. But I also knew they would never charge me for asking the price. All I had to do was to feign the confidence of a potential customer as I walked into the shop.
“Hi, I am looking for wedding suits.” I started as I examined the dummy. “This particular one has caught my fancy.”
Having been examining me herself, the shop attendant thought it best to save mine and her time by telling me off with the price of the suit, which by my estimation, it would cost me a kidney and a portion of my liver.
“Do you have this in midnight blue?” I pretended like the figure I just heard was the least of my concerns. “I need four matching sets, different sizes of course.”
“That could be arranged, you just need to give me the sizes.”
I knew she was starting to fall for this old trick, but I had to fake a phone call to convince her even further because I wanted to ask about other items.
“Hey, guess what; I’ve found really nice suits that should fit within our budget if the lovely lady is generous enough to give us a discount.”
“You’re going to give us a discount right?” I turned to the lady.
“10%.” She replied.
“She says because we’re buying four, she’s going to convince her boss to give us a 15% discount. Trust me we can’t get a better deal than this.” I continued my phone conversation. “Tell everyone to come on over to Kiseminti this evening for fitting. Let me go withdraw the money.”
“Can I look at your shoes?” I turned back to the lady who had now dropped the attitude. And with surprising enthusiasm; she started showing me shoes with price tags that had more digits than my salary. She was also kind enough to show me their jeans, some of which cost a little more than my monthly rent. How much does one have to earn to buy a pair of jeans at 550,000?