Konshens Ruins Ugandan Girls with Bubble.

Last Friday night 05th Oct is a day that will be talked about for a while for the colossal concert that Konshens—born Garfield Spence—had in Kampala kick starting the Golden Jubilee independence celebrations. Also to be remembered about the concert is how much Ugandan girls have learnt from all the TV plus YouTube and what they can do on stage given the opportunity.

The gates were open at 3:00pm and by as early as 5:00pm, there were more people at Kyadondo Rugby Grounds than there were at 11pm for the Sisqo concert. By 7pm one had to literally wrestle their way through the entrance as what were meant to be lines had degenerated into rowdy hordes. The situation was so bad that a few people who didn’t have the muscle for the scuffle were left with no option but to walk away with their tickets and drown their frustration in beer from neighbouring bars.

By the time I elbow greased my way through the check point at around 8:40, I found Michael Ross on stage performing follow follow before he was followed by Baboon Forest’s Big Trill with push harder. Ross was later called back to do a little Azonto with DJ Shiru; yes, apparently the Shiru who does wicked things on turntables also knows how to Azonto.

Thrilling performances were also put up by Young Mulo, Fidempa, Don MC, Viboyo, Klear Kut and later Chameleon who shared the stage with the Do Sum’n hit maker.

In preparation for Konshen’s performance, Mr Mosh (the MC) hosted mini-auditions on stage for the best bubbler who would in turn get a chance meet and perform with the red mohawk star on stage. This should have been the point where the age rating of the show should have been declared, or at the very least a warning should have been issued to prepare the few non suspecting members of the audience for the eye popping scenes that would ensue.

While some girls were literally being dry humped on stage Jamaican style, others exhibited astounding skills in an ass bubbling show down. One outstanding contestant was a girl dubbed ‘kateteyi’ who wiggled her butt so vigorously that she paid little or no attention to the fact that her red underwear was the only cloth left to guard the most private of parts on her body. I could have sworn ‘kateteyi’ was on some illegal Jamaican substance or the electrifying squeals from the crowd of perverted fans had induced an adrenaline rush that drove her to temporary insanity.

Another interesting chick that pounced onto the stage to bubble her heinie was the whooping size of a small iceberg-size that could only be matched by her vanity.  Like a force of nature, this one couldn’t be stopped by anything, not even by the booing she attracted from the crowd. In her black tutu, she first sauntered along the stage before bending slightly brandishing her larger-than-life ass to a seemingly disgusted crowd. Then suddenly; when everyone least expected it, with the agility of a professional pole dancer, she slumped her tush onto the stage with a perfect 180 degrees stride and when she landed; boy oh boy! Chick did wicked jolts with her loins that my editor won’t let me describe.

But moving on to Konshens; he climbed the stage at 11 pm sharp after 20 minutes of excellent reggae and dancehall spins from DJ Gmoney  a.k.a the Dancehall Ambassador straight from Jamaica. The Simple Songstar wore maroon boots, blue jeans, a white fitting T-shirt under his maroon checked jacket , and his trademark red Mohawk. Without wasting time, he started by sampling us riddim renditions to popular hits before performing all his popular songs in an interactive manner with his audience who sang along. Among these was; No Retreat, Do Sumn, Jah love me, The realest Song, Pretty Devil, Gal a Bubble and the crowd’s favorite,  Simple Song.

At the stroke of midnight, when law enforcers asked him off stage, Konshens had done approximately 20 different songs and was solicitous enough to skip the ones that the audience was not familiar with. There is no doubt that he lived up to his earlier promise to give us nothing short of our money’s worth.

Written for proggie.ug

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